The thread in which we tell embarrassing stories about ourselves and others
03-29-2016, 03:34 AM
Post: #1
The thread in which we tell embarrassing stories about ourselves and others
The stories do not have to be about you personally but they do have to be true. No lying in this thread, I'll know. Okay, I'll go first:
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When I was in 10th grade there was this one girl who was really into me but I wasn't really into her as anything more than a friend. One day while I was standing in the lunch line she asked one of her upperclassmen friends to walk up to me and ask me if I would go out with her and I said okay. This was the first relationship that either of us had ever been in, obviously.

A few weeks later, after we had been "dating" for a short while, she ambushed me in hallway on my way to the bus and kissed me. The kiss wasn't bad but I was already running late and didn't want to miss the bus so as soon as she was done I said something along the lines of "Okay thanks, see you Monday, bye" and then just walked away. The inside of of my mouth tasted like cherry-flavored spit and I didn't want that taste in my mouth for the whole ride home and so as soon as I got outside I spit it out onto the sidewalk and I'm like 85% sure that she saw me do it. Anyway, we didn't go out for much longer after that.
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Alright now somebody else please tell a story to help wash away my shame and also so that this thread isn't just me talking to myself forever.

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03-29-2016, 03:54 AM
Post: #2
RE: The thread in which we tell embarrassing stories about ourselves and others
Ooh, I've got a good one, I think. For weird, awkward high school stuff, here's a story about how I accidentally held a dude's hand:


So in 11th grade, I was the kinda guy to hang back and let everybody else bulldoze on ahead of me at the end of the day, because I didn't want to get trampled by a crowd of rowdy freshmen, so I did what any good high schooler did and popped in my earbuds. I was kinda not really hurrying to catch up to my friend who had texted me to meet him in the bus loop and I didn't want to make him wait or anything.

As I'm heading out of the doors to the bus loop I see this chick and this dude on either side of me, walking at angles that made me realize they were converging. So I figured I would speed up so that I could get past them before I got caught behind them. As I'm walking, this kid jostles me and knocks out my right earbud. No biggie, I reach down to grab it. It grabs back. That confused me, so I did the only logical thing and squeezed. It squeezed back. I finally look over, and I see the dude looking back at me. It takes us a couple seconds to realize we're holding hands. I let go. He lets me let go. I keep walking, he heads back to the chick I assume is his girlfriend.

Before I make it out of the doors, I glanced backwards, hazarding one last look at this guy. He looks super confused, his girlfriend looks super confused. She motions at me and says something, he shrugs and looks up. We look at each other for a moment before I turn away and head out into the bus loop. I meet my friend outside. He says to me, "Dude, what took so long?". I honestly respond with an 'I don't know'.
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03-29-2016, 06:38 AM
Post: #3
RE: The thread in which we tell embarrassing stories about ourselves and others
That's a great one because the other guy had to have been just as embarrassed about it as you were and the girl probably felt so betrayed for a split second or two there.

Alcohol has caused me to vomit into at least three separate kitchen sinks, and also once onto a space heater that made my bedroom smell like vomit for the entire winter of 2013.

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03-31-2016, 01:33 PM
Post: #4
RE: The thread in which we tell embarrassing stories about ourselves and others
I had never been to a homecoming dance up until this year, my senior year of highschool, i had always assumed it'd be really cheesy and bad.
I show up and meet my friend and her boyfriend, so thirdwheeling, im already off to a great start. About 8 pm my friend leaves and so i go and hangout with some other dudes that im sorta friends with and try dancing or something when a song comes on. I dont know how to dance. We eventually found ourselves in the thick of the crowd near the stage. we're in a lunchroom mind you and it's basically a cluster of underclassmen right in front of a 1ft stage off the ground. it's hot and gross, and all the freshmen are like, doing weird shit like jumping on the floor, twerking, etc. it's honestly really uncomfortable. not to mention it's like 10 degrees hotter (farenheit) in the center and you cant really dance without hitting someone.

So im sitting in the center, kinda bobbing up and down, im really hot, almost sweaty in my suit. and im just not even enjoying this at all. Eventually i find my way out of the clusterfuck of loud music and bad breath to hang out in the middle where there's far less people. Little to my knowledge, one of the guys i was with requested Gangnam Style and at that point i threw up my hands in disgust, because that's the meme-iest shit i've ever seen. Regardless to say i did the Gangnam style dance with a buncha random dudes and had a good time (almost) and went home later, reminding myself "this is why i dont go to school social gatherings"

It's time to, T-T-T-T-T-T TRIPLE POST
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04-10-2016, 01:03 AM
Post: #5
RE: The thread in which we tell embarrassing stories about ourselves and others
One time I was getting ready to go to the gym and then as soon as I was finished putting my shirt on I took a drink and immediately spilled water all over my shirt. I quickly swapped it out for another shirt, took another drink of water, and then spilled water on that shirt too. At that point I realized that it was probably meant to be and so I just left the house with a damp t-shirt on.

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04-10-2016, 03:34 AM
Post: #6
RE: The thread in which we tell embarrassing stories about ourselves and others
One time I borrowed my dad's van to go make a taco bell run at like 2 in the morning, and on the way back home a cop pulled me over because my dad had forgotten to renew his license plates. I sat there for like 10 minutes patiently waiting for the cop to get out and come talk to me, but I was very hungry and so when the cop finally decided to walk up the first thing he saw was me deepthroating a burrito in the front seat and then he laughed at me and on second thought I'm not sure why I thought this story would be a good fit for this thread because I did absolutely nothing wrong here and I regret nothing.

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04-10-2016, 03:39 AM
Post: #7
RE: The thread in which we tell embarrassing stories about ourselves and others
Once, I went out to get some thai food at some small restaurant with my family. We go in, I get my delicious pad thai, the restaurant is completely empty because it's late. I'm the only person in the family that ordered pad thai. My friend comes in with her family around the time we're finishing up, I started talking to her a bit because I know her, she knows me, we're friends. They all order just as we finish packing up our leftovers.

I'm the last person in my family out of the restaurant and I make it approximately three steps before fumbling my styrofoam takeout box and spilling half a plate's worth of pad thai all over the sidewalk. With my family cracking up and no idea what to do, I pushed what pad thai I could into the box before throwing it away and booking it.

My friend lost it the next day in class when I confirmed that it was, in fact, me that made a huge mess on the sidewalk.
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04-11-2016, 02:05 AM
Post: #8
RE: The thread in which we tell embarrassing stories about ourselves and others
"someone shat pad thai on the sidewalk"

"oh yeah that was me"

Edited for Readability and Preservation of Sanity - The Revolution - OP - Chapter 1/2 - Chapter 2/2 (missing maps) - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 (Ongoing) - Chat
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